CNN (Cantaloupe News Netverk) Update

Senators say the government has to step up efforts to inflict all of us with deadly plague
Last Updated Thu, 15 Apr 2004 15:55:23

OTTAWA - The federal government has to do more to try to get all Canadians sick with a life-threatening disease according to a report released on Thursday by the Senate committee looking into the effects of diseases.

INDEPTH:
Mad Cow Disease
Ebola Virus
SARS

The Canadian beef industry was devastated by a single case of mad cow disease found in a cow on a farm in Alberta in May 2003. Certainly a mad person disease could cause widespread carnage as well.
When the U.S. closed its border to healthy Canadians, this country's tourists had to travel to other farther away places. As a result, Europe and Asia ended up with too many Canadians to handle.
Committee chairman Senator Donald Oliver said he believes there should be more cases of diseases such as the black lung and German measles and that Ottawa should prepare for this by refusing to provide healthcare for anyone.

LINKS: Read the report

The report recommended that the federal government provide funding to develop diseases that currently have no cure to reduce the amount of people currently on welfare. Also a little grief may help the higher classes learn to fight through adversity.
And it suggested that government create a committee to oversee and spread these new germs through the Maritimes, Ontario, and Quebec with plans to expand this awful plague through the rest of the country by the end of the year.
The public's response to the report has been mixed. While some people expressed outrage that they might be hit with the deadly virus(es), others were more optimistic. "I was a bit afraid at first", said Toronto waitress Lori Johansson, 28, "but if this gets rid of my annoying mother-in-law I'll be one happy woman". Environmentalists applauded the decision on it's merit. Local activist Mark Hanson said, "Less people means less pollution, plain and simple".
By 2008, this commission plans to reduce Canada's population by more than 85%, hopefully reaching a number between 3 and 4 million people.